unearthed.

posted : Friday, May 9, 2008

title : sedih!

I'm way way emotionally unstable today. Like, seriously. You should have seen me after getting back from Causeway Point after school. HIGH, CRAAAAAAZZZYY and ECSTATIC like no one's business. pasal pasal pasal....ntah eh. =p

Then we had a briefing on the trip to Xi'An, China. The whole class is going! Except Girija, Thurai, Hui Yan and my dearest dearest SAKINAAAAHH!!! bleghs. =/
Anyways, I can't wait.
It'll be fun.
BUT.
We'll still have to complete tasks over there. Educational trip mah. Haiya.
Hopefully I don't get lost over there since I can be quite a blur at times.
Hopefully no case of whatever virus/flu/disease hitting us. Naudzubillah.
Hopefully my lungs don't go black with all those overrated air pollution there.
Hopefully nobody sees the crybaby me since I'll be missing mama like crazy. mummy's girl what! =p

Stayed back quite late with Elia NURBAYAH, Fafafafa-khrin and WIWI-the-dayu for PW. I've got an awesome group with the same level of tolerance towards sanity. We're practically laughing 2/3 of our discussion time. We're still quite productive though! Crazy arh satu-satu. But it's really amazing how PW has bonded us real close. I can't believe we had confession period with ELIA the other time when we're not even close despite being classmates since PAE lahh. Then there's still Fakhrin who somehow, became our male confidante and and and, SPY. hahahaha! Thanks arh korang! I really really love you guys can! Everybody go "awwww....."! =D

After which, I went totally EMOTIONAL and sank into DEPRESSION mode the moment I saw something. haiya. I've still not yet recovered from my extreme sorrow can? why oh why?!
I was happy. Yet at the same time, I couldn't help that burning rage of jealousy in me. Subhanallah.

Oh Tuhan, jangan kasi Athin terjerat dalam sangkar perasaan Athin, Ya Allah.
I hate these feelings of helplessness.

YOU! I don't want to like you can??!! I don't even know you lahh! Gahhs.

And no, I don't think he knows. I know I've been uber paranoid lately. I don't think he even realises my existence let alone notice anything.
So, good riddance you paranoia! =D

And yes, I'm happy I've got MDM AHTENI BINTE AGOS as my mum. It's a blessing to be able to tell your mum everything, right down from the smallest, littlest, most trivial random stuff like liking SOMEONE, to your deepest fear like...something. So, I LOVE YOU MAMA! =)

Tomorrow's friendly against Yishun ITE. Scary like semacam. I hope we don't get thrashed. God, let miracles happen. Amin.

9:52 PM